The Bachelor Recap: Chlamydia and Bin Chicken Drama Told in 18 Tweets
Welcome back to another bachie recap!
This week, Stephanie is the lucky gal that gets to go on a date with Jimmy, because the only appropriate measure to take when someone calls another person a C You Next Tuesday is to reward them!
Anyway, remember when Steph said in episode one that she hates pilots? Well, she has zero recollection of that, because now, no one loves aviation more than her.
Steph meets up with Jimmy where he reveals to her that she will be flying a plane during a simulation activity, which is her cue to prove just how much she knows about flying.
While Steph is fake flying the aircraft, Jimmy is distracted by her “beauty”, which is probably the reason why in the next scene the engine is on fire.
Look, at this point, I was sitting on my couch confused as heck. How can a plane which doesn’t have an engine have an engine fire? IDK.
The date is taking a weird turn, as plenty of sexual innuendos are being thrown around casually.
After they survived a near-death experience (seriously, Jimmy needs to stop taking these women on planes, fake or not) they went to a hotel.
I know what you’re thinking, but no, they did not do the “deed”. Instead, they both had separate rooms much to Steph’s disappointment.
In a cliche moment taken straight out of Christian Grey’s notebook, Jimmy (by Jimmy, I mean the producers of the show) gives Stephanie a dress to wear to the next half of the date.
It’s red, which is fitting because she’s a giant red flag and Jimmy should RUN.
Steph, by some miracle, remembers how she thinks all pilots are cheats and rapscallions, as she tells Jimmy she knows a bunch of pilots and they have a rep for being unfaithful.
My question is: Where is Steph finding all these pilots?
Jimmy reassures her that he’s a family man who just wants one woman, which is why he came on a reality dating show where he dates 23 women at the same time. Lovely.
The make out, she gets a rose and let’s fast forward over all of that because we’ve seen it a million times before.
Next, we cut to a scene of Jimmy and a friend who has the same amount of abs as him, running along a beach.
He introduces his lifeguard friend Finn, who is very good looking and will most likely be the bachelor next year, I’m calling it now.
As the girls swoon over Finn, Jimmy brags about having a bronze in surf lifesaving, which isn’t that big of a deal TBH.
Back at the mansion, Steph arrives back home with a rose and tells the girls that she kissed Jimmy.
Sierah is NOT happy. She asks Steph how she’s feeling about her connection with Jimbo and Steph responds: “Better than yours”.
Back at the group date, Holly swallows seawater and starts to feel sick, and man this girl just cannot catch a break.
She’s taken to the hospital, but Tatum just wasn’t buying any of it as she accuses her of fake drowning to be able to spend more time with Jimmy.
Speaking of Tatum, she ends up getting a rose from Jimmy for “trying hard” during the challenge, which sounds to me like it was a participation award.
It’s cocktail party time and for some reason, the girls are dressed as their favourite animal.
Tatum came as a hawk, but Holly, who now feels much better, mistakes her for a bin chicken.
Tatum is mad at this point but no one cares because Sierah walks in dressed as a phoenix.
In true Sierah fashion, she shared a bit too much information when she told the camera she wanted to come dressed as a koala because “I like sleeping and I’ve definitely had chlamydia” but thought otherwise because explaining that to Jimmy would be too awks.
Girl, if you can say that to thousands of people on TV, I’m sure you can say it to Jimmy.
Speaking of Jimmy, he walks in dressed as a wolf and resembles Taylor Lautner a little too much.
As Tatum bitches about Holly, Ash takes Jimmy to the jacuzzi to have some not-so-private time.
By not-so-private time I mean every single woman was watching them from the sidelines.
The women end up losing their minds as they start climbing trees and making strange animal noises.
In the end, Elena is sent home, and it’s the most heartbreaking thing because not only does she not receive a rose, but she has to walk over to the Uber waiting for her dressed as a monkey.
See ya tomorrow!